Felix
and Max
by
J. Smith Kirkland
This
can't be that hard. He has watched all three of them do it before.
But since this is his first day as a human, he wishes he had paid
more attention now instead just waiting for the bowl to touch the
floor. Think. First they open that little door, and take out a can.
“Come
on, Max. Can't you do anything?”
“I'm
working on it, Felix. I know I have to take the food can over to this
noise maker, but I I never really saw what they did with it.”
“That's
the wrong can anyway. They give me the food in the short ones.”
“Well,
I know they give me the big ones. So we are doing one of them first.”
Felix
rolls his eyes. Max notices the handle on top of the noise maker
goes up and down. When it goes down, it makes noise. He plays with
that for a while.
“Max.
Concentrate.”
Max
figures out the top of the can sorta sticks to the round thing under
the handle. So he puts the can there and pushes down the handle. Lots
of noise, and the can starts turning, and the top comes off. Max
jumps up and down with excitement for his achievement.
“Yeah,
yeah, you opened it. Now open mine.”
“Just
wait, I have to get it in the bowl first.”
He
shakes the can until the content plops into the bowl. He immediately
puts his face to the bowl to eat, but gets more up his nose than in
his mouth.
“Dude,
do you not pay attention to anything they do? They use their hands to
eat.”
“I
didn't think you paid them Any attention.”
“I
watched their every move. They just thought I wasn't looking. Like
birds in the grass, they had know idea. Now open mine.”
“Hang
on. I have to get this off my face.”
“Bored
now.”
Max
start unrolling paper towels and wiping his face. Human faces were
much more sensitive to having things on them apparently. He starts
back to the cabinet to look for the small can for Felix, but sees
Felix had opened the big white box and is going through the contents.
“What
are you doing?”
“This
is where they keep the good food. The stuff they eat. Remember that
big bird you grabbed from the table last winter?”
“Oh,
that was delicious.”
“Well
they put stuff like that in here to eat later.”
Felix
pick up a plastic container and open it. The contents looks like tiny
green trees. He smells it, makes a displeased face, drops the
container on the floor, and moves on to another container. Max picks
up one of the little trees and eats it.
“It's
ok.”
Then he
eats the rest.
Felix
opens a bigger container. The aroma reaches him immediately.
“Aaaahh,
Bird.”
There is
most of a dissected and fried bird. Felix picks out a piece and takes
a small bite.
“Give
me one. Give me one. Give me one.”
“Fine.”
Felix
picks out a smaller piece and tosses it to Max. Max tries to catch it
with his mouth, and fails.
“Remember,
dude, you have hands now.”
After
they were full, well after Felix was full and made Max stop eating,
they went back into the living room where their new lifeforms
happened.
“Max,
we have to decide what to tell the humans when they get back.”
“They've
been gone a long time. I miss them.”
“Yes
but they leave someone to feed us, and they always come back. So
let's agree on what to tell them.”
“We
can just tell them who we are.”
“Maybe,
But what do we tell them about her?”
Felix
was referencing the dead house sitter stretched out on the living room
floor. Her name was Claire. She was middle aged woman, who fancied herself a Wiccan. She had been reading up on transmogrification
spells. And an old woman she met through a meetup.com group for
witches had given her a spell to turn herself into a cat. She thought
a good time to try this out would be while house sitting for her
friends the Johnstons. To her surprise, the spell worked, but in
reverse of what she expected; it turned the dog and cat into humans. She was mortified.
Literally. She stood wide eyed staring at them, and the moment Max
said, “Whoa, this is awesome,” her heart stopped.
“We
can bury her,” Max offers, remembering there are lots of things he
buried and no one ever found. No one, including him.
“We
could eat her,” Felix countered, “But I'm full, that would take
weeks to eat.”
He looks
at Max, “Or at least a couple of days for you. And they could be
back any moment. We have no idea.”
“Let's
bury her.”
“Okay,
but remember, you have hands now. Follow me to the little place out
back, and I will show you what they dig holes with. You should be
good at it.”
Just as Felix and Max were finishing Claire's burial in the backyard, The family came in the front door. Bob, the dad. Joan, The mom. And Lucy, the daughter. Bob calls out for Claire, "We're back, Claire." Lucy calls to Felix and Max. Neither get a response.
"She here somewhere," Lucy said as she hold up Claire's purse. Dad found something else on the floor. Claire's spell.
"Does it smell like something burning in here, Bob?"
"Yeh, a little. Look at this."
He handed Joan the paper with the spell on it.
"Oh yeh, she fancies herself a witch."
"And she was going to turn the cat into a human or something?"
They both laugh, but then they hear the kitchen door open."
"Claire?"
The sound of Bob's voice makes Max extraordinarily happy.
"You're back! You're back! You're back!"
He runs into the living room and hugs a startled Bob. Felix follows him into the room.
"Max! Down! Remember they don't know who you are yet."
After everyone calmed down, police were not called, and ball bats were not swung, Felix explains the food lady was here, and was dancing around with some weeds on fire.
"It was quite frightening."
Max interjects, "It was. I was scared. I told her to stop."
"Then the next thing we knew we looked like this."
Still not sure whether to believe Felix was who he said he was, Bob starts thinking rationally.
"Where is Claire?"
"In the back yard," Max eagerly offers.
Felix corrects him, "She left out the back."
Max reassures Bob, "We didn't eat her."
The
Prompt
A
character who knows less than the reader tries their best to deal
with a problem they don’t fully understand.
Story
A Day Framework
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